Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Broken and Alive

There are many Bible verses I recite often in the quiet of my heart. They are power-filled words I have taken ownership of to guide my daily life. Different verses for different reasons. The Holy Spirit continues to be faithful in encouraging and comforting me by bringing to my mind the Word of God; a light unto my feet. 
I call them my "life" verses.

Psalm 46:10James 1:2-4, James 4:7, and Nehemiah 8:10 are just a few muscle-packed verses that speak holy strength, wisdom and peace to my soul. 

And, then there's Psalm 139:23-24.

I don't recall how long ago the Holy Spirit planted in my heart the passage written by the man after God's own heart, however, I will say it continues to be one of the Spirit's favorite choices for me. 

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting."

I've prayed the Psalmist's words so often I must admit, at times, they have been rattled off in bland habit. 

Just recently, during devotion and quiet time with the Lord, I was met with one of my "life" verses; Psalm 139:23-24, as God would have it. Delivered by His faithful Spirit, I was compelled to think intently on the familiar expression. With deep earnest I wrote out David's words and made them my prayer to my Lord.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my ways; and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

That very day God answered. And He answered me again the next day and the next day and the next. And today He is still answering me.

"...and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

It is humbling to be corrected by another person. However, I find it quite different when it is God speaking correction straight to my heart. Still yet, it's a whole other story when both take place simultaneously. Talk about brokenness.Talk about love. Because of His great mercy and love, my Father in heaven, opened my ears to take notice. And by His steadfast grace I am moved to repentance. 

Victory for the Lord. 
Victory for me. 
Victory over sin. 
Sin in me.

Holy brokenness.

This is grace.

It is interesting to know that the Hebrew translation for the word "wicked" in verse 24 means the image of an idol.

In reflection, I realize what God has been doing, revealing to me what He sees in my heart--images of idols. My selfish motives, ego-driven thoughts and "good" works that I have prepared for myself, all the while half-heartly walking in the good works He has chosen for me in Jesus. O how easy it is to get off track, to move into what I want and what I think is best while self deception and clever disguises ignore what God wants and has prepared beforehand for me to walk in.

I am His. 
And I desperately need His grace in this life.
And I am deeply grateful for His love that covers, His Spirit that leads and His Word that gives life to my life.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them."
          Ephesians 2:10 

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